Book Review: The X and Y of Buy by Elizabeth Pace

Remember the old adage – women are emotional creatures?  Can the same be true for men? Let’s face it, compared to men, women are more empathetic and emotionally connected to other people. Examples of these gender differences are evident in everything we do, including how we shop. In The X and Y of Buy, author Elizabeth Pace argues that a sound sales strategy is founded on such principles of gender differences. Her aim in this book is to teach fellow professionals what motivates male and female customers to buy products, so they can use this knowledge to improve their profit margins. The author addresses her claims practically, using real life examples to scientifically analyze specific gender differences.

Of the ten chapters, I particularly enjoyed Chapter 8 – The Economics of Emotion. Pace takes the reader through several scenarios pointing out partially obvious gender differences. I use the term “partially” because while you will readily identify with your own gender’s point of view, you will also learn something new from the viewpoint of the opposite sex.

Here are some of the subtitles Pace uses to point out gender differences in this chapter:

He trusts his institutions; she trusts her connections

Men tend to trust strangers in their clubs, companies or teams; women tend to trust strangers who share a personal connection such as a friend of a friend.

Men are wired for action; Women are wired for connections

Men will feel the need to discuss solutions and create a plan of action; women will need to discuss her feelings and evaluate perceptions before taking action.

In stress he’ll fight or fly; in stress, she’ll trend and befriend

Men tend to become physical or leave in stressful situations; women will find many ways to keep busy and talk through the stress.

So, are men emotional creatures? YES! The trick is to know the keys to triggering the right emotions and avoiding the wrong ones.

Although this book was written for marketing and sales people, I couldn’t help but recognize how the information could be applied to relationships. There is a section in the book called “Sales Interrupted”, where Pace states, “men view communication as a way to solve a problem, and interrupt only to introduce new information, change topics, or disagree – all forms of aggression. Women talk to form bonds and gain consensus; they interrupt to support, agree, or clarify – all forms of empathy.  Women salespeople can improve face-to-face results by merely resisting the urge to interrupt to show support when listening to a man.” Something to keep in the back of your mind at your next spousal debate!

While this book may not be for the seasoned marketer, it is definitely for the new marketer searching for a fresh take on marketing approaches. The book is divided into two sections. Part one, covers gender differences and marketing tactics. Part Two, contains plenty of examples of face-to-face selling strategies.

Pace’s humorous writing style and use of visual aids, make for a very engaging and enjoyable read. My only disappointment with this book was the lack of sufficient academic research on gender differences that could have captured the attention of all marketing professionals.